Things that make you go "Hmmm"
After posting about my nightmare of a date (it is Halloween tomorrow, after all...), I decided to give myself until 4 p.m. to sulk and erase Alain from my mind. So I jumped back in bed, threw the covers over my head, ate some Halloween candy that was intended for trick-or-treaters, and felt sorry for myself for 1.5 hours. Then I went to the post office to mail a package, and that's where...
...I met Simon. Here's how it happened: I hurriedly asked the man behind me to keep my place in line while I went to look for an address label. He said "Sure, and I'll hold your package, too." (He wasn't even concerned that I might be a terrorist!)
I really should wear makeup on a regular basis. What results!
So when I returned (and noticed that he's tall and handsome), he said he'd be happy to mail the package, as well. To which I coily responded "But you wouldn't know the address." He replied, "I don't care where it's going; I only care about the return address." Gulp. This guy appears to be a World-Class Flirter! Can I keep up??
{Brief intermission while I stop Truffle from flailing the cat's bed around the room in her mouth.}
Where was I? Oh yeah... So he asked what I do for a living, etc. Small talk, you know... He said he has a condo on the beach, his second home, and would I like to come to the beach before the weather gets too cold? I could bring my dog; he has a boat; why don't I come over and he will show us around. (Yes, I have to interject my dog into EVERY conversation!) I learned that he's from Venezuela. He looks to be about 40. He asked, so I gave him my business card.
Fast forward to the postal desk: the employee guys say, "Hi, Simon! How are ya?" So I ask, "You guys know Simon?"
"Yep, he's been coming here for years!"
"Is Simon a good guy?"
"He's great!"
So I go, (clearly emboldened by my date-gone-wrong): "Is Simon MARRIED?"
Customers and employees laughed. I don't care.
Simon quietly said to me "Divorced."
Eureka.
And the moral of the story is: I really should use makeup on a regular basis.
...I met Simon. Here's how it happened: I hurriedly asked the man behind me to keep my place in line while I went to look for an address label. He said "Sure, and I'll hold your package, too." (He wasn't even concerned that I might be a terrorist!)
I really should wear makeup on a regular basis. What results!
So when I returned (and noticed that he's tall and handsome), he said he'd be happy to mail the package, as well. To which I coily responded "But you wouldn't know the address." He replied, "I don't care where it's going; I only care about the return address." Gulp. This guy appears to be a World-Class Flirter! Can I keep up??
{Brief intermission while I stop Truffle from flailing the cat's bed around the room in her mouth.}
Where was I? Oh yeah... So he asked what I do for a living, etc. Small talk, you know... He said he has a condo on the beach, his second home, and would I like to come to the beach before the weather gets too cold? I could bring my dog; he has a boat; why don't I come over and he will show us around. (Yes, I have to interject my dog into EVERY conversation!) I learned that he's from Venezuela. He looks to be about 40. He asked, so I gave him my business card.
Fast forward to the postal desk: the employee guys say, "Hi, Simon! How are ya?" So I ask, "You guys know Simon?"
"Yep, he's been coming here for years!"
"Is Simon a good guy?"
"He's great!"
So I go, (clearly emboldened by my date-gone-wrong): "Is Simon MARRIED?"
Customers and employees laughed. I don't care.
Simon quietly said to me "Divorced."
Eureka.
And the moral of the story is: I really should use makeup on a regular basis.
posted by Yaakova | 2:15 PM
5 Comments:
Well, I would really love to say...
WOOOO HOOOO! YOU GO GIRL!
but after the last episode, I might just say a quiet 'good luck'.
Make sure you give us all the juicy gossip :P
BB-
Whatever happens, I'll take you along for the ride!
At this point I can't promise it will be a GOOD ride, but at least it will be real.
Thank you again.
OMG, you crack me up! I thought you mentioned something about a lack of confidence! As B.B said - YOU GO GIRL! How do you manage to pick up someone in the post office! Man, I have to mail stuff more often! I missed you guys while I was away!
Keep us posted!
Maureen,
{Note: What happened to my comment?! I just wrote one that disappeared!}
Here it is again:
It's so good to have you back!!!
I'm thinking I might have scared Simon off with my boldness re. the 'married' question.
Not that I regret it; it was cathartic!
LOVE IT!
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