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Location: United States

I'm a woman who is considering emigration from the USA to Israel. I'm not Jewish, but have enough of a Jewish background to be allowed under the Israeli Law of Return. I am a zionist, but sadly, as a child my main understanding about my family's background was being taught by my grandfather about the Holocaust, and that these were "my people." I wasn't raised with any cultural or religious traditions other than regular American ones. BTW, my real name is not Yaakova--I made the name up. (But I must say, it has a nice ring to it!)

Sunday, March 04, 2007

I'm in California

Hi Everyone,
Wow. Lots to write, and not a lot of time.
My friend Nina, in Concord, California, was diagnosed with a brain tumor two weeks ago. I flew out here from Orlando last Tuesday to support her on her road toward surgery, and I'll return to Orlando this coming Tuesday.

Her tumor is benign-- though it's hard to think of something as "harmless" when neurosurgeons have to saw a hole through the skull to get it out. But in the end, I think she's actually VERY fortunate: she has great insurance, her children are being amazingly supportive (two are flying in for the surgery), she has tons of friends who love her calling, stopping by, bringing meals, etc. And the risk of fatality with the craniotomy/tumor removal is less than 1%. And (this is my favorite part) her surgeon is the chief of neurosurgery in a very large neurosurgery facility. (Kaiser, in Redwood City.)

So here I am. Cleaning her house to deal with my stress, trying to be helpful, and basically just hanging out. Her current boyfriend and I despise each other. I can't wait till she gets rid of him-- she deserves so much better.

Two nights ago, her boyfriend lost his temper and barked at me to shut up. And get out. And I wasn't even being argumentative! I think he is really threatened by my being here. He seems to like the thought that he's the main person who cares about her, and it seems to threaten the security of his world for her to have a supportive friend around.

Apart from his obnoxious presence and verbal abuse, I'm doing okay. I'm revisiting my glorious relationship with See's candy, we're having fun taking BART into San Francisco and having very cool shopping days, and enjoying Nina and her children, who I haven't seen in 5 years. So many things have changed here since I moved away; it's a little disorienting at times.

BTW, Chag Sameach! Nina and I went to Chabad in Walnut Creek yesterday for Shabbos, visited with her old friends, and talked about Evan from Planet Israel!
They are (of course) so proud of him there! Unfortunately, Nina didn't feel well enough today to go to the Purim festival there.

Apparently, having a brain tumor excuses you from just about anything! When we're in restaurants, Nina will casually say "Oh yeah... I have a brain tumor, and will be having surgery on Tuesday..." You should see how fast the service improves!!! We've now extended this little ploy to mentioning it to attendants, shopkeepers, deli servers, store employees, and anyone else from whom we want good service. It works like nothing I've ever seen! We're tempted to keep milking it even after her surgery, but that would just be wrong. :)

Hope you're all well. And just say no to brain tumors: they're not worth the perks.

31 Comments:

Blogger Maureen said...

Hey Yaakova,
Give my best wishes to your friend Nina. As a few words of encouragement, my cousin had a brain tumor removed a couple of years ago and is good as new. His 3 year old son at the time asked him prior to surgery - "Daddy, when are they taking your brain out?" Out of the mouths of babes. Then last year, a dear friend also had a brain tumor removed and she too, is good as new. They can do miraculous things. It sounds like Nina has a great attitude and that is half of the battle. She also has a great friend at her side (that would be you!)I will keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. Give my regards to See's candy! I miss them, but certainly don't need them, but if you are really a friend, you'll have one (or two)for me! Stay strong.

Sunday, March 04, 2007  
Blogger Ephraim said...

I've got a cold, but that doesn't seem to get me much sympathy. Perhaps you'll come out to Israel some day too?

Tuesday, March 06, 2007  
Blogger Maureen said...

How did Nina's surgery go? And how are you holding up? Keep us posted.
Have a safe trip home.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007  
Blogger BagelUndertheCouch said...

men suck!

hmm...brain tumor, huh? interesting ploy. next time subway makes my sandwich wrong, i'll have a fit or two over it, because of my brain tumor, and get a free drink, or something.

glad to see you're doing ok! we missed you!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007  
Blogger Baleboosteh said...

Good to see you blogging again Yaakova! :D

Her boyfriend is probably just feeling very stressed. I can understand it in a way - I looked after my Mum who had 3 cancerous brain tumors (2 lots of surgery and radiation) for 6 months before she passed away. It is a very stressful time for him too.
I am sure everything will go well for her, she's lucky it is benign.

What's she going to do to improve the service she gets when the surgery has been and gone...maybe think about less fortunate people?

Tuesday, March 06, 2007  
Blogger Paige Kearin said...

Best wishes to Nina. It sounds like your being a great friend to me. She'll never forget who was by her side during this time. Blessings to you both.

Thursday, March 08, 2007  
Blogger Maureen said...

How's Nina doing?

Monday, March 12, 2007  
Blogger Maureen said...

Just checking in with you. U ok?

Monday, March 19, 2007  
Blogger BagelUndertheCouch said...

happy easter and chag sameach and all that jazz!

Sunday, April 08, 2007  
Blogger Mr Bagel said...

Hey when are you going to post again slacker?

regards Aaron
Mr Bagel
Visit Mr Bagel

Saturday, April 28, 2007  
Blogger Maureen said...

R U back from Israel? Wanna hear all about it!

Sunday, May 27, 2007  
Blogger Batya said...

You've left us in suspense. I hope all is well.

Monday, May 28, 2007  
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